i'm trapped between life and death and uncertainty
my head always feels like i'm stuck hanging upside down
a quantum dream in which anything is everything and nothing
reality seems to have been all but unwound
i'm coughing up smoke as i drown

the TV screen static
is burned to the insides
of my eyelids and now that is
all i see when i close my eyes

constantly dreaming,
but never asleep
it feels like i'm floating
but i'm sinking deeper and deeper
into my mind
leaving behind
all that i used to call real

countless epiphanies met in between train tracks
entropy and insanity conspiring to wear me down
walls full of polaroids and bottles of prozac
crying out for help in the middle of a silent town
i'm coughing up smoke as i drown

the microphone feedback
is stuck in my ears
when the sky is jet black
the noise refuses to disappear

constantly dreaming,
but never asleep
it feels like i'm floating
but i'm sinking deeper and deeper
into my mind
leaving behind
all that i used to call real

concertos played on
nothing but black keys
incandescent light bulbs
dangling from trees
i'll write about this wonderland
if i ever make it home

**i'm leaving behind
all that i used to call real