I didn't know my first love would be like this
it's not an explosion that's rocked my world
not a tender heart blooming
not even a year long ****-fest
it's trying to wipe tears away when he tells you he's not fit to be with anyone
it's hiding the parts of you that you struggle with
so he doesn't have to carry the burden too
love isn't something for me
love is something for him
it doesn't end, it doesn't falter

I don't explode, I don't yell, I don't scream
I just hurt all the time until the hurt hurts
I don't want to be released from these chains
because i've come to love them
like i've come to love you
weather this is a short time in our long time
or the longest time of our short time together
I know i'll never love like this again
and i know my heart won't break
in tiny shards, piece by piece
for anyone like this again
there will never be this many pieces of me to give out again
loving him isn't kissing in the rain
or sweaty bodies intermingling in the midday sun
it's the nights i've spent facing the wall
choking back tears
because he's said two words to me all night,
again.
loving him is not being loved back
because there's not enough of him for me.