She kicks my shin really hard and I scream with shock and pain.
"Stop yelling, it's making me feel guilty!"
"But it hurts!"
"But I didn't mean it."
This pain is not subjective, it's not perceived, it's very real.
"You're hurt hurts me."
"I can't help that it hurts you, for I am living with my pain."
"I can't help that your hurt hurts me, I must live with my pain too."