have a teddy bear. I sleep with him 365 days a year and I sometimes get separation anxiety from not holding him in my arms. He has came on countless vacations with me, countless car rides, and countless sleepovers. Countless times he has watched me paint my skin in the morning till I washed it off at night, countless times he has watched tears stream down my cheeks while my breaths stagger uncontrollably. After one incident, one “are you okay?” one bad day and you are in my head. The first time you spoke to me was the first time something other than my teddy bear stopped the tears instantly, so I don’t think you can come close to imagining how I felt when you swallowed the poison and took a chance at death. The first time you spoke to me was the first time I read someone’s future like an open book and darling, This is not where your story ends. I have seen the daughter that you will one day cradle in your arms as she breathes lightly through butterfly lungs and flamingo lips. I have watched the stars form on her cheeks,connecting her universe to yours as your love for her explodes into a supernova. And darling you are going to love her the way I love you. I have watched a girl ride into your life on a moonlit path and slay the demon that we call depression, and I watched your fingers intertwine the way your future will. I have seen your sister who you will love the way I love you, and I have seen your mother and your neighbor and your best friend and your dog all whom you will love the way I love you. But darling, I’ve also seen the blades. Ive seen the days when you start to think that slicing your arms so deep that the metal dances through your veins is the only answer but I am here to tell you that it is not. I have read chapters of your life that you didn’t even know existed; pages that you thought the author left blank because of a sudden, tragic accident. But darling I promise, This… is not your ending but a start to a new beginning