Silent winds break through my hair,
I watch you walk away through blurred eyes.
If only everything had been different then maybe.
I feel my body start to shake,
The weight resting upon my shoulders.
I hear your words repeating in my ears,
“I still love you, but it’s your choice.”

It was my choice,  
That’s why you’re walking away.
I can’t be hurt anymore;
I don’t want to know you for only the pain.
I can live with the memories, I can handle the separation,
I can’t know the future, what will become of this all.

To you I may look small and weak,
Desperate to pretend it never happened,
Wanting nothing more than to accept.
I can’t accept your choice, I didn’t make it, you did.
Wishing will only bring thoughts of loss and loneliness,
The “what if’s” will rise anger from within me,
Looking you in the eye and telling you just how I feel,
Brings terror to my heart and bones just at the thought.

The road in front of me is steep,
The choices I make will determine my path,
I carry a heavy load that I cannot bare,
I need strength to guide me,
A light for my feet and a peace to my fear.
I’ve always known of one but have never trusted,
Now is the time to fall into the unknown,
Put my faith into the unseen and just know,
Know that my strength comes from the One who gives life.

It was my choice, it still is.
Yours was made but more can still be made.
I choose to heal, to live and not dwell on the pain,
To love without retreating back to fear of what might come.
Scared of loss and distrust but also I hope for love,
Love can be healing and precious.
You will not skew my view of life,
I will move on. That is my choice.