I have never taken the time to write about myself, never the tears of my past or the pain I have felt.
Only the relationships I have spoken about, about the ones who have caused hurt from their coming in and going out.
I am afraid and scared for what reason I can't explain, but everything about me is like a wreck lace train.
I'm worried and anxious I long to be free, behind the painted on smile their are heavy chains that you dont see.
Depression and fear consume my life, I feel like I lost a battle that I never could fight.
I'm trapped inside this cycle I can't get out, every "It will be okay" has all faded out.
When I'm alone and scared I cradle my head in my hands, and the feeling that runs through my existence I pray isn't the end.
I cry without reason I'm sad without cause, between the anger and pain their is no pause.
I look around and see everyone living their life, then anxiety and fear stab me like a knife.
I am trapped and that you dont understand, you look at me but you dont see who I am.
It hurts to think that this could be all their is, I pray to God that it will reach its end.
You dont catch me when I fall you dont understand how lost I feel, you have no idea what its like for nothing to seem real.
I have a **** in my heart a tear in my soul, the feelings i bear show no sign of hope being told.
I feel bad that I can't be the person that you want, I myself feel like I will be the only one who hasn't won.
I've given up on you ever understanding because you dont, I can't say i blame you this kinda relationship I too would not won't. So alone I'll sit with my head in my hands and pray this thing I battle I win.