I failed
I couldn't reach out to any of them
not for long
they wanted to be understood
none wished to understand
truly
honestly
walls that couldn't stop death
but rather
prevent life
emotion and intellect cannot thrive
for some time and still today
we are born to die

My mind wants to wander
My heart wants to love
If I have a soul
I want it to be

Solitude is my oasis
it is away
becoming more of a home
a part of the earth

I feel myself getting closer
closer to silence
closer to feeling
closer to her

loosening beneath my feet
swallowing me
slowly enough for me to say goodbye
to all the poison leaving me

molten, passionate love
becoming the very beating of life in me
warmth emanating from the core
spreading outward to just beneath the surface

I am cold and hard to all who dare to approach me
to look at me
to judge
but I am not lifeless
I am not a part of your country
not your territory of any kind
I am not a part of your culture

I use your language so you will understand as best as you can
because you do not have the ability to understand another
truly
honestly

I am returning to earth