They say the best way to find out what you want is to find out what you don't want. I don't want to, but I want you. Let's call it a love - hate thing. It's simple, I love you, and I hate myself for it. No. I don't fear your rejection. Neither do I expect reception. I just hate that it is so evident yet in my inadequacy, I fail to embrace it. I hate that its concentration varies with the seasons, meanwhile you remain a constant. Condensed in my subconscious, unchanging, with all reason to. And I love that. Yes. It's a love - hate thing.