1

' I am deadly serious!' you said
My reply: ' Sue me then--when you are dead!'

2  
   Charlie, what should we do with Charlie Sheen?
   He would never come clean
   He takes delight in creating any public scene
   And often he's quite obscene!

3
    Two men argued in the tram vehemently
    Over the definitions of  'monkey' and 'chimpanzee'
    They went into a rage--came to blows--nearly
    A third man came along and said: 'Please respect our ancestry'  

4

     World population to grow to 9.7 billion
      By 2050 from the present level of 7.3
      The downside is food scarcity
      The upside is --fewer of us would suffer from obesity!

5
         I don't care much about money
         (But truthfully I do have have plenty)
         Only when I reach 123
          Would  I give away my money to charity