the ghost of every person i ever loved
        that has ever hurt me
lives in my shadow
               (they whisper of my worth)
      put them to rest
how do i put my ghosts to rest?

i said i wouldn’t bury you but
these seeds are useless
        planted deep in my chest

i can’t hold you close
so i’ll blanket you in dirt
leave you to grow
to sleep in the earth

     in the sun
           and in the rain.

i'm sorry dear, i won’t be here
to keep you out of the shade.
it’s my turn to walk under the sun
and this time,
alone

     hope to see you
          next spring.

hope you’ll be glowing shimmering shining
           (a yellow rosebush in my garden)
golden like my memory of may
when i hadn’t kissed you yet.