the ghost of every person i ever loved
that has ever hurt me
lives in my shadow
(they whisper of my worth)
put them to rest
how do i put my ghosts to rest?
i said i wouldn’t bury you but
these seeds are useless
planted deep in my chest
i can’t hold you close
so i’ll blanket you in dirt
leave you to grow
to sleep in the earth
in the sun
and in the rain.
i'm sorry dear, i won’t be here
to keep you out of the shade.
it’s my turn to walk under the sun
and this time,
alone
hope to see you
next spring.
hope you’ll be glowing shimmering shining
(a yellow rosebush in my garden)
golden like my memory of may
when i hadn’t kissed you yet.