i'm missing something i never had
a part of me that i can't get back

...because its still sitting here in my chest,
settled in like a cat in winter,
bathing in the glow of my sighs
sinking in the quick sand of my apologies
lodged in the crevice of anger, unforgiven -
no "sorry"'s for the part you never stole
you didn't lose it, you say, your eyes darting
like lizards looking for a spot of sun

no, you didn't lose it. it was never gone
i can feel it in my clogged wet paper throat
resting like the sun might never rise
i am missing something that i'd never lost
because i'd never found
it