I told you, I know I did,
I told you that you were all I have.
Without you, I’m a half.
The moon without its stars.
Doesn’t matter who else is there, if you’re not around,
Everything means nothing,
Don’t do this.
You don’t understand yet, because I haven’t let it all go yet,
Haven’t unleashed my words for you yet.
But it’s like a volcano, give it time, I’m going to erupt, everything I’ve
Held inside of me. One day, soon hopefully, I will tell you, I will let you know
What you mean to me, and why it hurts so much to sit here and wait for you.
Waiting isn’t the key issue here. It’s waiting every day. You say I gave up?
Yea, I was pushed passed my limit; I wait everyday, every shift that you work, that I work,
You really are the light at the end of the tunnel, but for some reason you have cones set up and a man holding a sign in front of me telling me to wait; just enough to tease me, yet not let me through. I can taste the end. You torture me day and night. Texting isn’t enough for me. I need to see you, yet you make me wait, every time.
You say I’m mean to you; well maybe you have a taste of what I go through. You always have me at the end of the stick till you’re ready for me, like I’m some convenience, you say I’m mean and I’m repeating your past, well sir, this is the same **** I went through too, and believe me, I’m not going through that again either, my defense is up and I’m not your convenience, I’m not going to wait here, putting my life on hold, just so I can be with you. If I don’t mean that much to you, let me go please, this isn’t worth it, I’m not giving up, I’m just not putting my energy into someone who can’t give me back what I deserve.
I wrote it. He took my soul. My first almost love took away all the magic and joy out of life. Cut me so deep no one can see it, yet I bare it every day and live with the pain every day. A year later I still feel the pain, but I’ve dosed myself with the heaviest pain medication, maybe that’s why I can’t fully appreciate or open myself to you, he took it all, all the chips, and all the wonderful feelings, I think I’m still numb from the medication and I don’t know when it’ll wear off…wait for me.