I sit at the booth,
Thinking to myself,
**** restaurants that don’t have a television
Making me listen to insipid conversations
The kind that only in-laws seem to be able to speak

The fumbling and stumbling over topics and
Phrases repeated without any real meaning
Thought or understanding

I stare off into space and nurse my whiskey
But even it won’t fully drown out
Their side effects

“I’ll have the cheesecake,”
I hear one of them say

“Burger extra rare,”
The other hurriedly offers up to our waiter,

Our waiter
Fresh out of high school
Oozing pimples down the pores of his ***-marked face
Uniform stretched taut against his bulging stomach
Exposing crater like outline of his belly button

I wish that I could be the waiter
I envy the waiter
He gets to walk away from this table
And away from a flowing sea
Of faltering words

Someone’s talking to me
Asking if I’m keeping up on the OSU football drama

But I don’t hear them,
I’m too busy studying the Egyptian architecture
And wondering what it has to do
With the Cheesecake Factory

My wife kicks me
Bringing me back into this dreary reality
Telling me to answer the question

“No, I haven’t,” I say
As they began awkwardly telling me about it

I signal our waiter and ask for another whiskey

It’s going to be a long dinner tonight