this show I just finished
was a tough one
for sure

neophyte actors
big cast
weird script
and the ****
“KYLE’S”
sign

this is the first show
I’ve been allowed to direct
in a while
and,
for that,
I’m thankful
but,
at the same time,
I’ve hated
it

in a show about robots
willing to fulfill every whim
and fancy of the owner,
it all came
down to me,
I feel

my blood, sweat,
and hard work made
this thing come to
fruition

a truth that
shouldn’t really
have to be

at the end of it though,
Property Rites
(as it was called)
is probably one of the best
shows that’s been put
on in years
by my
theatre


for that,
I’m proud
but,
at the same time,
I’ve hated
it

everything came
down to me

I’m not afraid of having
the world on my shoulders,
but I am tired of being the
only one pushing it into
the future

the **** “KYLE’S” sign
sums it up the best

up above the stage,
high above the heads of the girls
playing robots
and the guys playing repair men,
and business people, and a pathetic
**** fool,
was supposed to be this big red sign,
done up in lights,
spelling
out:

K Y L E ’ S

(that’s the name of the guy
trying to sell the robots)

I was the only one who could see it
I was the only one who could write it out on board
I was the only one who could pester our teacher to cut it out
I was the only one who could paint it right
I was the only one who could drill the holes for the lights
I was the only one who could plug those little lights in
I was the only one who could hang from the rafters
I was the only one who could get anything done with it

at least that’s how it seemed

it wasn’t a hard job
but at the end of it
I said
**** it
let the sign rest back-stage
as the show went on
and
forgot that I ever even
wanted to have it

I was the only one willing to finish it,
even as everyone loved the idea and
applauded me with each new way it
could be used

I was the only one pushing
this unnecessary but grand
idea forward

I was the only one,
and when I decided
the work was not
worth the ends, no
one could say any-
thing when I said
**** it

this last couple of months
have been a tough few
for sure

just trying to survive
has felt like going above
and beyond

trying to twinkle in a world
full of darkness and gravity