I dream no warnings of the pain yet to come
in the night before my heart comes short yet again.
I've never been so glad to see you turn your back
because as the tears begin to slow
and the fresh wounds begin to flow,
you can't be here to see it.
So much for love, I say goodbye
to the stitches that barely held me together.
I say goodbye to you.
So much for safety, I say goodbye
to numbness so appreciated.
So much time to be alone in a crowd
because your hand's not in mine.
Now I can't stand to walk away from you
because I know you don't want me anymore.
So much for a second chance
our first try fell to pieces, it was the first and only.
Pressure building, forcing us apart.
I'm still reaching for your hand
but you're busy hiding your heart
and you don't understand you're shutting mine away.
Expect this to last, like the pain,
yet laying here alone, I can't bring myself to shed a tear
so I think on the words you said, and understand.
My lips will never brush yours again,
your fingers will never follow my veins so lightly.
With your clean break, your fingers become razors.
Now there's a heaviness in the beat of my heart,
a stabbing pain in my throat with each shuddering breath,
old wounds split open with every pulse.
If this is my life, then bury me with all of these words.
All I want is for you to offer me your arms sincerely
to tell me that you'd miss me.
Tell me what those words meant to you
and open my eyes again.
Nightmare wishes never go unfulfilled
In my sleep, I tell you to never say 'I love you'
but now I don't need to worry about it.
Do you cry over this like I do?
Sobs that might as well be silent
because the person you need to hear them doesn't?
No need to think about leaving and dying
you took the choice from my hands.
Cutting me down, soon nothing will be left.
I'm exhausted, apathy as sharp as this useless self-pity.
I sigh, and the sound of it sends me over the edge.
Now I'm lost in a crowd,
no sound but the echo of your voice,
asking me how long I though this would last...