LISTEN TO ME! – THE MADMAN!


Oct 15 2009 – Damascus, Syria

Ayad Gharbawi


Feeling feelings
That  come from nowhere
Sinking my life
While my
Surfaces are barely reaching
Their stable mind

Soulful fright
Sparkles that dazzle, yes, but have no meaning
For myself
Go within
In my mind’s shredded images
That you call vision
But that are for my fractured Self
Incoherent and blurred


I feel only
Smiles of Sickness
Bare teeth of inconceivable stench
Exposing inner frailty
That just turns out
To be my own
Pulsating fear

I guess
I try
Trying to be
What I know
And what I know not
Trying to think
I think
I am
A fright
To you
And myself

Swaying sceneries
Make me dizzy
Yes!
The same sceneries
You people
That you people
Call your
Daily life
Some shine, and some not really
And if you are interested to understand
For my mind
And its Self
The results are fear
And meaningless
All over again
For me

My Tears provoke
You
But, why?
You say,
I’m paranoid?
You fools!


Who exactly are the persons
Do you think
That is, if you think
Look at my finger and where and at whom it is pointing
Again, I scream to you sane citizens
What are their identies
Of those and of them that are today and now
Holding all the thickest drenched sickening ropes
Meant for our fractured
Necks and Brains
Again and again?

When do you think
You may cease
This paralysing pressure?
That you apply
Upon me
Stabbing me?
Piercing?
Slicing?
Hurting?
Me
All
Within
My turmoil

***** is spinning
In my mind
Leave them –
Yes, them!
They are the Christs that are weeping
Hysterically
Moving me
Beyond sanity
While, where are you all?

And your polite rules are
Moving me
Way way far too much
For my stability
Polite subhumans
Flying
Make me
Flying
Make me
Flying from you all
From you all
Let me make me - fly far from you all!


Harrowing
Humans
Listen calmly
To my mind
Listen
To your own
Screams shrieks and all the rest
Before you think to presume to judge
Because you too
Some day
May suddenly
Come to be
Plunging in
My world!