Repeating the words "I know what it's like without you and I hate it" over and over and over again in my head
But the words someone how change to "I know what it's like without you and I'm scared" they are both the same thing I guess
Whispering over and over and over again to my ceiling "I don't want you to go I don't want you to go I don't want you to go"

Your eyes won't leave my head

There's a list of all the people who left and I keep writing your name down and then crossing it off
It's been too many times now
You should have stayed away
I learned to cope without seeing your face
I thought I'd be fine if I never saw you again
I knew it was a lie
Do you know what it's like to live on a shelf?
Do you understand your reality?
Do you wake up alone every morning and wonder what made you so weak?

I'm sixteen, I have a ****** ******* reputation that I managed to make for myself in an attempt to find my people
And yeah, I found my people
But the important ones are leaving
And I'm so ******* scared

The past two years taught me that they always come back
When you see someone you used to love, friendship or relationship
It's impossible not to miss them when u feel lonely
But when they move away
And they no longer see your face
They will forget you
They will not come back
They will move on

I was everything
I am nothing

I'm listening to the band you showed me
I'm remembering that day
In your bed
When I didn't know where we stood, but I knew it was too far away

I'm wearing my ex boyfriends shirt while telling you that when summers over I'm never going to feel loved again, cruelly ironic

Did I mention I was scared?

I love dead Beats cause they never leave so they never forget
My ex has a girlfriend but he told me it's gunna end
He told me that he misses me
And I've spent a lot of nights losing my mind because he's gone
Because I thought he didn't miss me
But apparently it's impossible to ignore someone in a town of 1600 people even in the middle of summer and everyone seems so alike

I want to fast forward to the future, see what it brings for you and I

That night by the falls last month, when you were crying and I was too scared to cry, you said you can't picture yourself in the future, implied you don't have one
I held your hand
I avoided your eyes

I told you it'd all work out, not having a single clue

That was the time I should have told you I loved you
Before we ******
Before I was hit with the reality of you leaving
When you really needed to know it

I'm sorry