Inside me something's screaming.
No, I'm screaming.
It's telling me I'm insane.
It's telling me to stop.
To change and act normal.
I'll try to distract myself,
But really I'm not.
It's still there.
The abnormal me is still there.
Suddenly I've found there's a word.
I'm pretty sure it fits.
I'm not sure that I'm not even more outrageous,
But just trying to make the wrong puzzle piece fit.
Wanting to continue,
But wanting it to end.
I want to live my life.
Not be buried in this made up mess.
My made up mess.
Skylar Grey says "you can't haunt me"
Well this already is.
I'd love to say I won't let you in,
I will win,
But that's not what I'm doing.
It's comfort and pain.
At least I know it's real.
That I'm not the only one.
However I'm still stuck here like this.
Would I rather be numb?
In the articles I read:
"Sometimes painfully aware."
Yeah, it's really painful right now.
Because I know that I'm imagining,
And that's not what people do.
I've always tried to prove I'm normal.
Now it feels as if the whole world has slapped me in the face.
Repeatedly.
And this won't be the end.
They'll find more things to bother me with.
And I'm just not meant to care!
You could say this is getting interesting,
But I'm not sure what else the world could have to share;
About "me".
Well they clearly don't know anything.
That's what I hope.
It's also what I know is false.