Adrenaline flows and you get ******
Where do I run?
What do I do with this?
I have this rage,
This undeniable fear.
Nowhere to turn.
Which way do I steer?
I can’t **** this pain,
It burns too deep.
The tears flow and the heartache seeps.
Seeps to the very depth of my being.
All that I know,
Everything I'm seeing.
It Reminds me of you,
And brings back this hurt.
This horrible need,
I want to feel.
I need to bleed.
Maybe if the hurt is from self,
Then the other will subside.
So I take this off the shelf,
Pretend everything's alright.
Then I drop the hammer,
Push this metal through me.
The pain I knew,
Still bites through to me.
Why wont this go away?
Why cant I feel okay?
Nothing seems right.
You are not here.
Everything I once knew,
Just seemed to disappear.
Nothing I say.
Nothing I do.
Seems to let you know what I'd do for you.
Train, bullet, insurmountable pain,
Things I'd take so you'd never feel the sting.
What we had,
That was real.
I can still grasp it.
I can't help but feel.