I created this feeling,
synthesized it from the depths.
Now my ego's been sent reeling
while my soul's eternal slept.

From extreme-isms oscillations,
first conditional love then none,
this pervasive vacillation
makes me feel I've come undone.

Can I balance give and take
with trepidation's breath?
Would it still be as fake
as giving up what's left?

Idealization's paved the road
from a half-remembered morn.
It's *******'s been the mode
and my soul's what's been torn.

I can't decide which choice to choose
to free me from all of this.
I could set the Furies loose,
if only I knew that help exists.

My problems have grown too massive,
so much larger than my strength.
Perhaps my approach's been too passive
and too drawn out in its length.

I'll try to align my focus, will, and intention,
but my authority is lacking.
My creative mind has no invention,
and of myself I give no backing.

Once my decision has been made,
I'll go forward or be drawn.
Progress's steps will never fade
so let's get on with it, or get it on.

I'll surrender to the task at hand,
bearing knowledge and responsibility.
Cast towards me all reprimand
which I'll greet without hostility.

I'll search out far and wide
for a consistent love's stability.
I'll find it wherever it may hide,
and nurture to the best of my ability.