Chris Lafleur wrote a new note: dear future self



Dear future self, 
i am writing this as a reminder of the misery associated with drug abuse.

At this point in my life i am addicted to heroine and crystal ****. I own nothing and live for a fix thats broken me down to a point that i can no longer stand on my own two feet. everyone i love has given up on me, and most of them cant stand to be in my presence, without feeling sick to their stomach. but i dont care because im to numb to feel. my emotions have become artificial only brought on by drugs. i live in a pretend world where my choices have no consequences, and my smile is only a side effect thats brought on by smoking crystal ****. i work everyday yet i have no coins in my pockets. its a struggle to wake up in the morning and my priorities are out of order, so badly that my beautiful son has been taken from me cause they deem me a bad influence, an unfit parent who cannot take care of him. i miss him so much its sickening . I try not to think because my problems are overwhelming. and im to high to deal because society does not accept what they do not understand . i wear sunglasses to sleep since im to ashamed to be seen, cause my eyes tell a story that i cant share with the public. lost touch with reality and love is nothing more than a word that i relate to painful memories. I must be crazy since i self inflict this misery. this day to day life i lead is a sad existance.and excuses mean nothing ten years later. time has passed me by i wasted life on getting high. i dont respect who iv become or any of the people i surround myself with and my best friend is heroine. sleep has become a luxury and its beggining to show in my apperance . im not the person i used to be iv changed drastically some for the better but im far from normal, my mind is constantly growing but with what iv witnessed, iv come to realize im my own worst enemy.