there is this candle that i keep in a box and i save it for nights when i want to think of y o u, when the summer air is too hot a n d i can imagine that you would have turned o u r air conditioning up so high t h a t i would have had to put on a sweater while you stripped downtonearlynothing.i wonder if we would have had those gardens you talked about or if you would have taught me to tolerate beer. i usedto think you were the s o l e orchestrator of every sunset i had ever seen, that you m u s t have bartered some part of y o u r soul in exchange for that laugh you had, that all of the absolute **** i had gone through was simply there t o l e a d m e t o you. but you did not love me t h e same way, you d i d n o t love m e the s a m e way.
tell me, do we have to bow down and kiss our own feet to become whole again?