I'm either floating between feeling nothing and everything,
Or get smacked around between the two by something.
When I feel nothing, it's indescribable, words can never satisfy or explain what that feels like.
It's like having a hollow head, an endless sinking abyss for a torso, and the arms and legs seem to be nonexistent.
Cigarettes, *****, and anything to lift my feet off of the ground,
make me feel normal when I get like that.
However, there's no quick fix,
for when everything decides to come crashing down.
I can't do a **** thing, except grit my teeth, and wait for it to end.
I can hear my blood rushing in my ears, my eyes twitch, every ***** in my body seems to convulse, my mind races a million miles an hour, replaying memories over and over like a broken record, and I seem to loose control of myself.
I cannot walk, stand, sit up, or move anything.
I can only give in, wait for it to end, and welcome nothingness with warm arms.