He's got these hazel blue eyes that I like to look in sometimes
His hands are much bigger than mine, and I've always felt so small compared to him.
He's hurt me again
And again
And again
But lately we find reason to come back together like opposite ends of magnets
The ones you stick on refrigerators
The really strong ones
That's us
He let's me call him and talk his ear off until 3 in the morning, because he knows that I get lonely at night
We always fight
I tell him to *******
And he swears at me too
I ask him why the **** he cheated on me
And he tells me he's such a **** up and I can hear the cracking of voice
It reminds me of the summers spent around the fire and the woods catching
He asks me about the other guy
"Have you kissed him"
"Do you like him?"
"Does he feel like home?"
I say no to most of the questions
He says how do you feel about me?
I reply with I dont know
He says I'm tired of I dont know
And I say I'm tired of your **** up excuse
It gets quiet and I remember nights like these
I tell my friends I hate him
I tell my family I loathe him
But when its 3 a.m. and the only thing between us is air and coded particles I can't help but want to kiss him
He was always good at that
From lots of practice I reckon
I don't tell him I'm going to be with another boy tomorrow
He never told me about the other girls
I can't help it
I loved him so much but I can't figure out if I'm just lonely or I actually miss him
I say I'm confused
He says
I know I know I know
I read him poetry
He starts falling asleep
And I get off the phone whispering I love you in different tones.
I wonder if he heard me
There's a part of me that hopes not.