With each step the keys swinging from my wrist lightly graze my thigh, urging it to continue moving forward and resist looking back. The aroma of freshly bloomed honeysuckle fills my nostrils with the sweet nostalgia of past springs alongside friends. Meticulously- picked songs bounce against my eardrums as the soundtrack to a life of simultaneous apathy, agony, and ecstasy. It seems some higher being knew that I needed to feel the lonely tonight in a way I haven’t allowed in quite some time, that I just needed to feel within myself everything I’ve been stowing away under my lungs, adding pressure to each breath that I never noticed was there in the first place, forcing away the laze with which I’ve treated the existence I’ve become. In my peripheral I see that colors are bursting in the sky behind me, and it’s enough for the wind to press my cheek to look back on a vision I’ve not witnessed since autumn approached, and I close my eyes to let my head fall back because it’s almost too much life to feel.
It occurs to me there is beauty behind us sometimes worth giving a glimpse, and if we don’t turn around at a time that calls, we won’t find our way back home.