Not like these things ever make sense. Makes sense? As if such a thing really matters. The relevance of something and how much it makes sense are both relative. As in doesn't matter. Nothing does. Not me. Not this room. Not the rain or the stars or the way my eyelids can't seem to stay open. Why? Don't ask me. Don't ask anyone. There's no need to ask anymore. Those old questions, will get you to nowhere. But if thats where you're after look no further. Welcome. A word I'd love to hear more often. You never seem to hear anything often enough these days. These days. Whats the use? Where's the appeal? Appeal? Oh I'll give you appeal. I'll show you a girl who gets everything she wants. Thinks she owns the world. And she does. But get this, she cries herself to sleep at night. Fair trade no? Some would say so. You look out those windows and all you see are packed streets filled with the stench of christmas shopping. Put a bullet in my head and paint the walls with my brains. You'd be doing me a favor. The first one anyone's done in a while. When its done I wanna fish away from wife and family and responsibility. Don't tv party too long. You won't be able to turn off the set in the morning. How long does it go? How long did I just spend writing that last sentence. Feels like ages. I'm half asleep. The other hand isn't there a hand unaccounted for. The last one to leave. Always. I leave alone. I go home alone. Even now... You guessed correct. Haunted. Vacant. Lost. I'm drowning. Growing up. But still. Ask yourself what you want. Subtract it. Head is pounding. And I hate to be alone. And I have to be of course. Of course. No. Never. I don't care and I don't care and I don't care. That's another story. A story about a baby who was let go. About yesterday. But sometimes these stories just don't have a happy ending. Sometimes you go from being the hero in your own story, to the villan in everyone else's. But not likely. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe its a terrible terrible tragedy. Sure enough they drive around again. That memories been following me. Burning me inside. The heat will bury us all. They can search all the want. Only I know the way. All gone. Everybody gone. Gone off the deep end. Okay. You never told. I wasn't told. Overrated. Under ground. Last kiss. But I threw it us up. So? No. Sometimes. I caught you like a falling star. The air is warm. The sun is gone. I am not well...