what quiet has made everything
so loud?
what stole all the sleep from
your eyes and all the
serotonin from your blood?
who gave you more than your heart
could hold?
is that why it feels so different,
because it's stretched and stretched
until it's too big for the small things
that do live there?
who emptied it all like gasoline
on the last shred
of what was beautiful?
what name did you try to
bleach out of your organs?
how hard did you cry when
it only made it brighter?
what was the best day you ever had?
now think of exactly
one year after that day.
do you see ghosts when you see
that date on a calendar?
what about all the days in between?
why does every good thing
that happens to you
only last as long as
their smell on your clothes
from the last time they touched you?
what about the night you swallowed the whole medicine cabinet?
did you hope that with all the
pills you took,
you'd finally be something
somebody needs?
when did you realize you can't
love anyone who could love
someone like you?