The rocky steps that lead to the sea
Were always a problem to climb
Always one careful step from a chaotic tumble
Into the misty void

And once the journey was made
Cold gray sand greeted me
Like a lonely desert
The horizon seeming father away

By chance id make it
To the edge of a frozen mouth
Already so drained of yellow life
Ready for the pain, the ice
To jolt me awake
To open my eyes to this grey sky

I would wait

Then hear your eerie whispers
Calling through the sea
The waves swelling, you
Would wrap your fingers around my ankles
I would breath out in relief

A fearful alertness, you were here
Your hair in the blue-grey sea foam
Your breath, the piercing wind
That slapped my cheeks

Your salty words, unsatisfying
Plugging my ears
Until all I hear are your letdowns
And fury.

The skies would darken, and
The swell would become greater
Until I open my mouth and scream
That I can’t take your bruises
And I can’t take my own delusions

But you have already started to pour down my lungs
Filling me with your ice and confusion
And I can see
All your doubts
And blackness
And overflowing emptiness

And I almost feel sorry, like I’ve failed you.
And I couldn’t help you
But I remembered,
You drowned me
With yourself.


-Taylor