Mother?
Do
You
Remember when
You
Pledged your heart to
Him?
I
Wasn’t even alive
Yet, I’m sure
I
Could see
You
In my mind.
White veil, a long porcelain dress,
I’m sure
You
Were very pretty
In your layers of make-up upon those dark green eyes
And perfect, luscious dark brown hair.
I know
He
Thought so
With his slicked back
Young dark hair
And beautiful blue eyes
You
Fell in love with from the start.
Clasp your hands,
Exchange rings,
Flash loving looks to the audience
And your best friends
Who all have tears in their eyes.
Do
You
Remember what the pastor said?
And then what
You
Repeated and promised?
And when
He
Did the same?
I’m sure your eyes were locked
Inseparable, blue and dark green mixing
Creating a concoction
That made the final promise –a kiss
The fiercest yet.
Lips molding, folding
And
Mother,
It’s over.
Later,
You’re home with
Him
And it’s morning after the longest night ever.
You
Had fun,
I
Bet,
But
I
Don’t think
You
And
I
Will discuss it, though.
Maybe another time.
Months pass while you’re in pain
And then
She’s born suddenly,
Premature, fragile
Broken
And dies after half an hour.
You
And
Him
Are never the same again.
Less than a year later
You
And
Him
Must have been desperate
Because
Another great night passes,
But it’s filled with tension and caution
And when morning comes,
You
And
Him
Are thankful.
I’m born suddenly,
After those agonizing, miserable six months
Why wasn’t it nine, though?
Only God knows
But it’s not like he’ll tell
You
Or
Him
Or
Me.
Behind walls of home
Things get stressful
With
Him.
You
Stayed for a while
Then left
Me
There in that white world full of beeping and weary eyes.
But
I
Grew up,
Mother.
I’m okay now,
Not that little baby in the plastic, translucent crib-box.
After another half-fun night,
Years later,
You
Know it’s never going to be like the first time.
Months pass
He’s growing in
You
And
He,
The one you promised everything to,
Is growing tired.
He
Isn’t the same
Nor are
You.
It’s the truth,
I’m not lying,
Really.
He’s born!
You’re overjoyed,
The shadows under your eyes gone
You’re actually happy
Because
You
Know he’s actually healthy.
And your husband
Stands near-by.
He
Looks okay,
But could be better.
I
Grow up.
He
Grows up.
But it was only two years.
We were only little children,
You
Must remember.
Yet so much can hurt the innocent
When the ties are broken.
You
And
Him
Were supposedly going to be together forever,
As if!
Taken away,
He
And
I,
From
Him.
We went
With
You.
The last hug hurt,
The last glance
Was even worse
Because
He
And
I
Had no idea what was going on.
A new home,
We start school.
We’re young
But we’re used to just
You
In the house.
No father.
I’m still used to it,
Mother.
Every kiss and hug
And whatever else
You
Do with the new
“Him”
Brings back every moment and memory you’ve told me about
With
Him
And
You
In that past too long ago.