I'll be gone soon. Maybe not to end this life, but be somewhere far. Away from you -- somewhere I'll feel safe. A place filled with serenity. A place I can consider safe. A place far from you.

Maybe this is running. At this point, I think running is better than staying in a place that's self-destructive to me. A place where I'm continuously reminded that I'm a horrible person. This is what they called 'home', but it never felt like that.

I've been taught that home is safety; it's family. I've never realized that this word is so foreign to me until now. I've never felt like I belong. I know I'm the outsider -- the intruder. I was the person that shouldn't be here. How is it possible not to feel safe with the people that supposed to be your family?