My phone is always
in my hand
except for when
the microwave
runs

except for when the
lights clicks
on
and spins, and spins
away

only when I'm heating
up my cracked
white
coffee cup

I am alone inside my head

and for this minute,
where I'm alone
with myself
I ache with need
for you
and I remember your hands
the day that you died
how soft and blue
and beautiful they looked
and that is why

I never put my phone down.