Can’t wait to be seventy With knees that hang Like fleshy skin tags Over my knee highs And Custard feet All squelched into my Clarks.
No prunes In my grocery basket Just lots of cheese Chocolate and beer Which will make me gassy So I’ll ask for a backrub To get my wind up.
I’ll say those things I’ve always wanted to say And not come off Like a social landmine Because people will just think I’m batty.
They’ll smile And nod And make corkscrew gestures Behind my back But I won’t care.
I shall say **** a lot Because people Will not expect that From a portly granny With a blue rinse. But I shall never be unkind Of all of the ugly words You can use **** is probably The most benign.
I shall read great books Filled with ideas And speak to the deaf geriatrics In the old folks home And say things like- So what did you think of that? And even as they Clutch their hearts To prepare for their exit From this world I shall say- I feel that strongly too And in this way Everything shall Be part of my interlude It shall all be about me Me Me Me