dark and poised
like the violet bruises on my hips
haven't eaten in days
haven't slept since
walked around early in the morning around seven
forgot who I was for awhile
I threw on a yellow sweat shirt this morning
a friend once said to me;
"Blondes can't wear yellow, it washes them out."
so I've never worn this sweater before
but I put it on and decided maybe I wanted to be washed out
washed out like my friends and
washed out because of drugs
and washed out because of depression
so i stumbled across gravel and saw a yellow dandelion growing in-between the side walk cracks
and I held open a door for a women
who paused and said
"your sweater matches your hair, how beautiful."
and my eyes started to pour like rain in February