Amidst all these options.
The light, the white, the delicate the clean.
The choice of something new,
someone untouched by my hands,
something fresh,
someone cool and unexplored.

I wanted you
I wanted your rich brown skin.
Your warm chocolate marble chest.
I wanted the familiarity of your design,
your feel, your works.
I'd turn around
and find
not the unknown
but my man.
and here is something I need to emphasize:
mine.

I could not imagine turning to find a
stranger,
however skilled and acquainted with the pleasures
and desires of a woman.

I wanted you.
The man who knows every crease and fold.
Every corner that is turned
and faced with imperfections - he knows how to handle.
Every part that feels broken
He knows how to fix, mend, heal and repair
You don't find that everyday.

In the cool satin sheets my body lay twisted in,
its your arms that I feel there too
wrapped around me.
The love I feel coursing through your veins,
and throbbing through your chest
is my safety,
my security,
my warmth.

I cannot bear the thought of sharing that
with someone
temporary.

For now,
I'll bear
the loneliness
and the cold
I'll wait for you to come home.