urging myself to see something
   that isn't there
parading myself by uninterested observers
   hoping for acknowledgment
keeping the faith
   when faith was lost so long ago
giving a smile
   when my insides are ripped to shreds
laughing at unfunny jokes
   hugging the grotesque
spending time with the offensive
         sharing a lunch with the mind-numbing,
uninteresting, humdrum, stupid

the circle of a lifetime
     coming to a stop
at an unknown destination.