I’ve gotten used to being set

Set aside

Set straight

Setting like the sun on the idea of happiness

Dying to so many dreams

I don’t have enough phalanges to count them on

People hurt me because they

Think they know me



(You don’t know me, not even a little)



I had forgotten how it feels when you hold me

I had lost the lust to know you

Blade sharp visions

Cutting away at my ability

To hold up my life card

I want to punch out and leave.

Pleasure and pain concurrent

*** and little deaths roll together

I have never spelled it out before

Your ***, your ***- your species, your intimacy

It murders my self-confidence

It leaves me barer than birth

And hungry for something

That isn’t real



(And you still don’t know me)



tears are my life’s work

blood is my excuse for living

I leave it in the veins

Because anything else would be

Too messy.

In my fantasies

We watch football on the couch

Drink beers with fancy labels

And I fall asleep on your shoulder.

I could make a whole life

In the small of your back

In the space behind your ear

I would color in your lines

And connect your dots.

We would be childhood happy.



(You don’t want to know me)