It scares me when I remember exact dates
From exactly a year ago and what they meant
Then isn't anywhere near what they mean to me now

A year ago today in just a few hours
You were handing me a dozen flowers on my front porch
And telling me how glad you were I was yours- forever

We overused the words I love you
And made promises I should've known we'd never keep
But i had fallen head over heels in a love so deep
I couldn't see a way out

Nor did I want one bceause for once I was a princess
You would've given me a crown if you had thought I wanted one
Instead I just wanted you to hold my hand in a crowd

Flaunt me to your best friends as the best in town
Because it was a feeling I had never felt before
I was used to back doors and stolen kisses
from boys not worth my time

Now for the first time in my life I had a boy
Who was more then proud that he was mine
And whos love was more then one of a kind

Every moment that I spent with him was an excitement
Whether we were vanadlizing our names under bridges
or just laying in the hammock in his back yard
while he taught me the names of the stars

Exactly a year ago today he told me he loved me
For the first time- with his arm around me
By the lake- just like the lyrics of a Taylor Swift song

A song that later became my anthem to our relationship
As we screamed the words to her new cd out the windows of my jeep
He wasn't embarressed that he knew them just as well as me

But just like with all loves we had our fights
Screaming that lasted deep into the middle of the night
When I couldn't sleep because his angry words haunted me

He told me he hated me and tore me down
For simple things that seemed to just slip my mind
I never meant to instigate our massive fights

Somehow we always ended up both crying into the phone
Begging eachother to forgive the other, and soon we would
He would end up driving to house just to give me a kiss

To take away the pain he had ensured
But now there is a pain in my heart he can't take away
Because he isn't here to do so

The pain of him leaving is the worst I've ever felt
And it leaves me dying- crying and wishing I was dead too
But I have more then him to live for, so I push through

A year ago today I promised him I'd never leave
And he promised me the same but now he's gone
I keep my promise every day when he shows up in my memory

For no matter how long it's been- I still can't let go of him.