I'm so angry with myself for letting him become my only source of pure happiness.
Something I strongly disagree with is depending on others for my own happiness.
I never have, but he walked into my life and he became so ******* special to me.
I've never felt the way I do about him, with anyone else.
He picked up my broken pieces and put them back together and when he left I shattered.
I didn't know what to do without him here so I smoked too much, I drank too much, I took too many pills. Anything to take the pain away.
But then I realized how disappointed he would be in me.
How disappointed I was in myself for letting it even remotely get this bad.
I tried my best to piece things back together. I tried so hard. But once something's shattered it can never go back to the way it was again.
Now I'm back to sitting on the floor bawling my eyes out at 2am because I'm so ******* broken.