I wonder what will happen to us when this becomes permanent
When I can't wake up to you laying beside me 9 out of every 10 days
Our only form of communication will become Skype, texting and phone calls
And we both already know we're horrible at keeping up with those
Will we fall apart at the seams like a t-shirt worn for year after year
Or will we hold strong like a building that withstands thousands of thunderstorms
I don't want to see such a bright friendship disenegrate to nothing
But as I've learned time and time again sometimes theres nothing to hold on to
I'm not good at letting go, but I'm worse at holding on
When everything I want to see us become is played against the chaotic picture
Of what we will be enduring in this next year
I feel tears tugging at the backs of my already red and puffy eyes
And so they fall like water pouring from a faucet
Thats been left on and walked away from
Pooling up and flooding every thought my insane brain can formulate
Hazing around every memory of you and I like it is already too late
Is it already too late to save my heart from this pain
I ponder as I realize that it is, the amount my heart aches for you to be here
Overshadows any thought of being able to pull away or forgetting you
And I answer my own question
Of course it is too late to spare myself
Now I can only cling to any hope that we can continue this closeness so far away
With my every being doubting myself and my abilities to keep in contact
My memory reminds me I have failed at this before
Turned around after just a few simple months of being apart from someone close
The knife in my back is turned like a wind up jack in the box
Every word used against me to explain the loss of my best friend
Is the music torturing my ears and the horrible clown of realization pops in my face
I don't want this to be you and I just as it was her and I
But what happens once is known to happen again
So my fearful heart will bring up it's guards and try to push you away
Forgetting as my brain knows that it is already too late
I guess this is what we get, for picking colleges so far away.