It is undeniably human in how we constantly seek explanations for our problems It's funny, the way we blame the alignment of the planets for our mishaps and frustrations, calling mercury into fault for our own mistakes I have spent far too long searching for answers I will most likely never find to blame it on astrology
Your hellos have morphed into avoidance and I miss the way you once looked at me like I was a single star in the middle of a loud Los Angeles sky I don't know exactly when you changed your mind or how and why but I do know that I haven't put the bottle back to my lips because the cool of it feels too much like yours Early on I prepared myself for the let down but that doesn't mean I didn't taste disappointment
This could easily be an apology but I'm not sure what I have to be sorry for and the word is overused anyway This could easily be an I am still angry but I'm really not, just aching and tired of the aftermath that follows wringing myself dry I poured out all of my contents and you don't even have the decency to act like you could have loved me I used to light up like an Idaho sunrise when I saw you but now when I do I have to dig laughter out of the depths of my stomach to pretend Iβm okay I am fading like the twitching light bulb in my room I am too weak to change
You made the mistake of telling a collapsing ceiling its perfection; you said there was nothing wrong with the structure I watched you leave and then I caved in completely Gravity had been calling to pull down for some time so I guess it makes sense that it finally did My only regret is how quiet your smile gets when you notice me now and my inability to understand why
I don't know what I did to create the dull in your eyes or what I did to make you stop caring I donβt know how we managed to go from pretend lovers to near strangers I am so sorry for something I can't comprehend, for something I didn't even do, for that which I am uncertain I am sorry that you changed and that I can't blame it on the retrograde of mercury Los Angeles has enough stars without me, I hope you find yours again one day.