I am staring down
From my  cliff-top refuge
Among clouds and chirped melodies
Into nothing...

          I know there is ground,
          A harsh reality waiting to catch me
          And shatter me...
                    But where?
                              Will I feel the embrace
                              Of the piercing rocks awaiting
                              In a week,
                              Or a year?
                                        If I jump,
                                        Will I fall alone,
                                        Or will you be there
                                        Holding my hand
                                        And pulling me clear
                                        Of the rough edge
                                        That wants to scrape and scratch my skin?

          As I fall,
          I am weightless,
          At peace...
                    But I fear the end,
                    When sea-sharpened teeth tear at my flesh,
                    And the ocean pours salt into my open wounds...
                              The open jaws of failure
                              Are inevitable,
                              Inescapable,
                                        If I dare jump...

                    But if I stay here,
                    In my solitary sanctuary
                    Of summer solstice,
                    I am guaranteed
                              Safety,
                    At the cost of submitting
                              To apathy,
                    To stay in this haven of detachment
                    I must be stoically unsatisfied.

          So it seems
          That I am torn apart by indecision,
          The ifs and buts cutting me deeper
          Than the rocks
          That lurk beneath the shroud of uncertainty
          Ever could.

                    Maybe you would be my wings...
                    Maybe the adrenaline would stir my motionless heart...
                              If I jump, I will land,
                              And be consumed by that monster of grief,
                              But falling would bring me such relief,
                              Possibly eternal, probably brief...

I stand on the edge of the cliffs,
Perfectly halfway between my refuge and the abyss...
          Arms outstretched,
          Eyes closed,
          I will let the wise winds of fate decide.