That smile used to be for me.
But now you give it to some other girl.
Some other girl who isn't me.
And it slices like hundreds of slivers.
You were ready to let me go that day.
I wasn't ready my brain screamed.
I wasn't ready, I'm still not ready, I'm never going to be ready,
but you've moved on.
I moved on my brain tells me,
but it speaks in half truths.

That smile that you give her used to be mine.
Those arms wrapped around her were mine.
The joy in your voice was mine.

I don't want to see you happy
and it makes me feel like a *****.
Still I want you to move on,
even if though I haven't yet.
Even if I must pretend
till I match the color of your eyes.
Even if I must ignore
the moistness coursing down my cheeks.

There's a reason I don't look at your feed on Facebook anymore.
There's a reason I don't talk to you as much as I used to.
There's a reason I don't want to think about you.
And every time I do, my heart breaks anew.
I pretend that I've moved on
and my heart breaks again.
Because that smile...
That smile that turns your eyes into the bluest skies,
used to belong to me.