I spend a lot of time
Trying to make myself
Smaller
To shrink myself down
So I take up the least space
Possible

I spend a lot of time
Wishing I could
Trim down
Sharpen my soft edges
Harden my shape
I would rather be someone's rock
Strong and safe
Than their pillow
With loose ends and a soft center

It's impossible to allow someone
To trace my softness
When I recoil where their fingers
Graze my skin
I can only imagine what they think
Of my weakness

It's impossible to live in this body
That I feel unsafe in
A fear I'm constantly aware of
Judgment from all angles

It's impossible to escape
I can't hide from this hatred
My being, my mind
Controlling the image of
My self, my body
My mind is sharp but my body is soft
There's no question as to who
Will give in