Sometimes I like to just lay down and listen to myself breathe.
I like to feel my pulse,
to remind myself, that yes,
there is still a heart in there.
Somewhere.
Somewhere, buried beneath all the empty pill bottles
and ****** knuckles,
there is still a human being,
fighting, pushing, beating
its way to the surface.
And I know that,
eventually,
it will come crawling out of my mouth,
and into someone else's.
It will leave me gasping,
begging,
and afraid,
and I'll never be ready,
but it will feel so, so good.
And I cannot wait
for its escape.