You weren't a summer love or a great Hollywood romance
You were cold February evenings and sweat pants
I was comfortable and that's the most dangerous when it comes to love
I knew your routine, how you liked your coffee, what side of the bed you preferred and what kept you awake at night

You were pancakes on Mondays at 3
You were who to call when I couldn't stop shaking
You were the one I screamed at when I needed to blame someone
You were my first kiss
They warn young girls about boys like you
But you weren't leather jackets and loud music
You were the opposite of it all

You are 3 am showers because I still can't wash you off 8 months later
You are mid day prayers asking god to give me strength not to cry when I see you in hall
You are why I can't believe someone could ever love me properly
You are why my Top 25 are all sad love songs played in a loop
That's what they don't tell you when they say breakups are hard
None tells you you'll write poems like this lying on the bathroom floor after you learn it was all for nothing