Sometimes I wonder if I'm ever going to be fine. I look at happy people and go like is that real I just don't believe in it. Dissapointments Heartbreaks Betrayal Lies Is all I ever got from people. How do I move on ? How do I go futher ? I don't think I will. I feel a thousand miles from happiness.
I sometimes wanna just open my heart love someone but I can't. I once gave someone that information of how I felt about them I was left on the cold hard ground. I'm just lost feeling like its never going to get better. Tears day after day. Fake smiles day after day. Anger is all I carry day after day
There is just this big hole in my soul that seems to get bigger everyday. And no mater how much I cry. No mater how much I listen to sad music. No mater how much I cut myself. No mater how much I sleep. It doesn't seem to get filled.
I laugh sometimes but during the laugh I start to cry because I know I'm laughing at my own life its one big joke. Its a dance that walks a song that speaks. How does one live a life she hates. I look at my self in the miRror and say I'm goin be fine but I can see through my eyes I dnt evn mean it. I just feel a thousand miles from happiness