sometimes i feel like I'm walking up a down staircase
like the whole world is moving in one harmonious direction
and I'm lost in a sea of roads antagonized by dead ends
my head feels crazy
bolts are unscrewed and wires are crossed
a mechanical malfunction
sometimes i am up
up up up
my skin tingles with activity
dynamite in under the surface ready to be detonated
vibrations circulate
and cells dance with one another
i am wild
animalistic
invincible

sometimes i am down
down down down
darkened hope reigns
a wave of black water runs around me in circles
my lungs spill over with it and i suffocate
my throat burns with sorrow
suspended in pure agony
as the waves laugh and swallow me
i am devoured by ebony
terrorized by my own thoughts
body stuck in a tar of sadness
i feel death smile down on my distortion
he waits for the waves to finally drown me

Some times i am red
red red red
anger is all there is
it clouds my vision
making my ember eyes glow
fire runs through my blood
feeding into my muscles
pure rage envelops me in its choke hold and i lose control
violence plays my core like a set of flaming drums
furry has made a home in my chest
covered in red, the anger waxes
consuming me in a blood moon

up
down
red
up
down
red

a see-saw in my head.