It's strange for me to think
that some women see me as their missing link
"By God" says I "They're blind
If I'm the best that they can find."
For I'm not a man of eloquent charm
nor one with protruding muscles in my arm
No seductive tongue nor Golden locks
Only words that the English language mocks
Definitely no Greek God would stumble so low
with my physique,the world to show
Just plain as plain ever could be
if they truly had eyes they'd see
I'm far from the **** wooing body
but rather fleshy and fairly stocky
God knows by pound or stone I am
of greater wealth than beef or ham
"But if it suits them Lord
Who am I to disagree!"
So welcome Women for all you care
of freckled Skin and receding hair.

---Alisdaire O'Caoimph---