i test my surroundings
casually sliding my hands across things i might like
i feel sick when i don't know
what i want

i like listening to other people
with my eyes
trying to figure out
what makes their pupils widen
and if they know what its like
to be stuck
in a vortex of thought

things like
not going outside
and always being alone
should be crimes
and i'm a terrible offender

it messes with your mind
you end up thinking too much
because there's nothing new
to interest your endless flood
of creative juice
i'm a noiseless blender

getting stuck in your head
is a terrible place
to be
the mind is a very large
but cluttered space
full of yesterday echos
and quiet heartaches
waiting to pounce

i'm really good at
creating my own personal hell
i need to learn
to close my mental door
in the faces
of my fears