Do you ever just feel so angry at the world
have you felt so alone
...that everyone was out to get you
that you had no place
and every ******* little thing erked you off
have you just walked down the street and have ab billion people stare at you like a monster like youv'e done them wrong...
and then you started to believe them..
began to transform yourself into miss confident but still comforming to look normal so people don't look at you like your "out of place"
it's like i have all this knowledge on confidence, on embracement, on individuality
and i don't know what the hell i'm missing
like i dont want to spend my life in the shadows of others
i want to be able to live
L I V E
like right know im breathing...
but im not alive
barely atleast
everyday i wake up
the first thing i think about is my ****** day that always awaits
my problems with anxiety
and i constantly tell myself all this crap on why i'm important and blah blah blah
the same exact crap every single ******* day
it's like i'm sick and tired of this crap
this life
i hate it right now
i hate being judged and hated for doing nothing to anyone but be nice
I'm sick and tired for being judged for who i am
i'm sick and tired of caring but i just can't
i can't
its easy to say it to yourself inside of your home
but once you step foot outside all bets are off...
but right now my only hope is faith
and i know that God will come through for me
but I can't take this crap any longer
and i'm looking for an overnight transformation
but God you have my word
I know that you love me, and you want me to learn from my experiences and mistakes to shape me to who i'm supposed to be...
and i'm holding your hand for comfort
i may not be the girl that i want to be today
but as long as i'm alive there's hope